


dread in my heart

by everydayclothes



Series: lute strings and spider webs [1]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, M/M, brief mentions of tres horny boys, character death not shown but its brian bc yknow he actually dies. thats the plot, listen up this ship was supposed to be a joke but im invested now WHOOP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2018-08-19
Packaged: 2019-06-29 10:28:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15727560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everydayclothes/pseuds/everydayclothes
Summary: Johann reminisces about his fiance.





	dread in my heart

**Author's Note:**

> my friends are so valid for suggesting this. anyway i am gay for the german spider elf and johann is spelled with 2 n's not one, fools.

The worst day in Johann’s life was the day he conducted the farewell rites for Brian.

It surpassed the day he knocked on Brian’s door and he didn’t answer, and he wandered the halls of the Bureau, searching hopelessly, fearing the truth he knew. Johann spent hours in his quarters, drafting plans. How to get Avi to let him down to the surface. How to avoid suspicion. How to get even moments with Brian, just to say _goodbye_ , and _I love you._

Only a few Bureau members attended the rites. The drow had not made himself popular on the moon. Johann pretended to be detached like the others as the Voidfish dutifully ate the information Johann fed it. It felt like a crime.

He spent many more hours after that locked in his room next to the Voidfish’s chamber, playing a song he had written for Brian. Hoping the music could extend beyond the moon down to the surface, into Wave Echo Cave, and into the ears of his fiance.

* * *

_“How was it?”_

_Brian’s beautiful eyes were wide, his mouth open. “Zat was gorgeous, darling! I'm so proud!”_

_Johann grinned and blushed. “It's for you. I, I composed it for you.”_

_Brian threw his arms around Johann, who almost dropped his violin. “I am ze luckiest elf alive to have you!” His face turned more serious, then, and he looked deeply into Johann’s eyes._

_“Johann, my love, zis is of ze utmost importance.”_

_Johann must have looked scared, because Brian touched his cheek and said, “Oh, zere's nothing wrong! I simply wanted to ask you a question!”_

_Johann expected a goof, a riddle of some kind. He did not expect Brian to drop on one knee and take his hand._

_“I love you, Johann, and I cannot express enough how much you mean to me. But, maybe zis will help communicate.”_

_Brian opened his left hand, his right holding Johann’s, and in it was a ring. Elegant and fine, with a black opal making up the body of a fine silver spider._

_He looked into Johann's eyes, searching for an answer, and he found happy tears. Johann nodded, incapable of speech._

_Maybe this is how people felt when they heard his music. He was sure this feeling was better._

_Brian slipped the ring over Johann's finger, admiring the silver against his tawny skin, and kissed his hand. “You are perfection.”_

* * *

Johann made his escape months after the rites. He couldn’t find a way to leave any sooner. Avi shrugged and let him into the cannonball with few questions. Avi didn’t pretend to understand anything about the bard, and as long as Johann wasn't actively betraying the Bureau, he figured it was fine.

Johann landed near Phandolin, now a circle of black glass.

He stared.

He considered getting right back in the orb to tell the Director, but he didn't. When was he going to have another chance at seeing Brian? Hoisting his violin case higher on his back, Johann set off towards Wave Echo Cave. Brian's last known location.

On the moon, Avi prepared another orb in the cannon.

* * *

_“I won't lie to you, my dear. Zis is not ideal.” Brian talked while his hands waved around, Mage Hands ransacking the closet and packing clothes into a bag._

_“Why do you even have to leave in the first place?” Johann tried and failed to avoid whining._

_The look Brian gave him broke his heart. “I don't want to leave, but - it's far too restrictive here! My magics can be so much stronger, darling, I can be stronger.”_

_“But what about me?” Johann was being childish, he knew. He felt helpless._

_“You can come with me,” Brian said, dropping the Mage Hands and putting one real hand on Johann's shoulder. “We can get married on ze ground! We can live together, happily, for - for eternity.”_

_Brian traced a long, slender finger over Johann's ring._

_“I want that so much! I want to get off this moon, and I can - I can share my music. I want to live in some sappy domestic bliss, Brian, I want that with you.”_

_Brian was nodding eagerly, smile growing. “Just come with me!”_

_He wanted to._

_Johann wanted to, so badly._

_“I can't.”_

_Brian's smile dropped. “What?”_

_“The Voidfish. It needs me.”_

_If Johann's heart had been broken by Brian's expression before, it was absolutely obliterated by the one he wore now. Brian's accent intensified. “I need you too.”_

_Johann stepped back, letting his fiance’s arms fall. “I just can't.”_

_Brian turned back to his packing. “If you change your mind, I'll be in Wave Echo Cave. Near Phandolin.”_

* * *

Wave Echo Cave was empty.

Johann shot off a couple sensing spells, but no go. It was deserted. He found a room that had clearly been Brian's, filled with trinkets and spider-related knickknacks, but no Brian himself. 

Maybe he was on a grocery run, Johann thought to himself, growing scared. There wasn't much point in staying to wait for him. He had to get back, avoid suspicion.

Johann ran out of the cave and directly into a lich.

* * *

_The tune was an Underdark one, lively yet ominous, good adventuring music. Not his most popular, but Johann enjoyed the feeling of playing the unusual rhythm._

_Someone knocked on his door._

_“Come in?” he said, setting his lute on the floor. He wasn't expecting anyone, but maybe the Voidfish was doing something weird._

_A drow popped his head into the room and said, in a bizarre accent, “Hallo, hallo! I love your music, dear, where is it from?”_

_Johann scooped up his jaw and said, “Underdark. You like it?”_

_“Oh yes, I do! I'm from zere, of course. It's lovely to hear something familiar.”_

_“Do...do you want me to keep playing?” Johann fumbled for the lute._

_“If you don't mind,” the drow said brightly, giving Johann a dazzling smile. Johann figured it wasn't a bad way to spend an afternoon, playing Underdark music for a (he had to admit) very attractive man._

_The drow left Johann hours later with a name - Brian - and the frequency for his stone of farspeech._

_It took some willpower to avoid tuning in right away._

* * *

The Red Robe didn't give Johann time to react before it sent some kind of electrical charge into his chest. The attack made him trip backwards and almost fall. He raised a shaking hand to shield himself, babbling curses and “please don't kill me”s.

Nothing happened. 

Johann opened a single eye he hadn’t realized he had closed. He was...on the moon again? In the main quad, behind a bush. He could see Avi talking to Killian and three unknown guys, adventurers by the look of them. New recruits. 

He stood up and brushed himself off, too baffled and overwhelmed to process how he had gotten back without any transportation. His violin was still strapped to him.

With a sigh, Johann got into the elevator. The three adventurers got in with him and immediately started talking to him. It was the last thing he wanted to do, but he kept up his end of the conversation.

He barely kept his voice steady enough to get through it, and they were too busy crying at his impromptu elevator music to notice. With luck, he would crash in his room later and start planning his next expedition to look for his fiance.


End file.
